Why a blog, you ask...
Great question! I decided to create this blog after losing several friends on Facebook due to my tendency to speak my mind. In today's climate of hypersensitivity to well, pretty much everything, and political correctness run amok, I guess my opinions can be a little much for some at times. But I genuinely enjoy meaningful, respectful conversations with people whose views differ from mine. So after going through an endless cycle of censoring myself until I could no longer stand it, speaking my mind, pissing people off, reflecting, censoring myself..., repeat, repeat, repeat, I posted this:
Dear Facebook Friends:
I think it's time for some of us to break up. A very dear friend of mine messaged me something the other day that reminded him of me. It was a post he saw titled "You Are Not Everyone's Cup of Tea." It talked about how some people are Your People and some are just not for you, as you are not for them, and how that is OK. I really took it to heart. I basically have 2 rules for FB - 1, I don't unfriend, unfollow or block people no matter what and 2, I don't turn down friend requests as long as I know the person, worked or went to school with them or belong to a group in common with them. Consequently, I have a wide range of "types" of friends. I have a handful (maybe 2 handfuls, since I am very blessed) of people who know me well, know what's in my heart and love me for who I am with all of my glorious imperfections. These are My People. I have a handful of friends who started out as acquaintances and have become good Facebook friends who enjoy meaningful conversations on a variety of topics and support my right to voice my opinion even though they may not always agree with me. I cherish these friendships as I think these are the people I learn from the most. Then there are the vast majority of my FB friends who know the on-the-surface Stacey. The Stacey who is polite, quiet, reserved and non-confrontational. You know, the Stepford Wife Stacey. I'm biased, but I have to admit that this Stacey is pretty darn likeable. She's the one you know if you've worked with her, you've met her through her volunteer activities or your kids have gone to school together or been on the same team or in the same dance group. Then there are the friends I've never actually met but that have some common interests. These last two groups are the people who have kept me silent about some things that really matter to me. I've been afraid of offending them because I never want to offend and I don't want to be judged solely for the way I feel about any particular topic. I am a complex person with a range of opinions and I like to learn from others whether they agree with me or not. So here's the deal...my friend's message made me think about how I'm censoring myself and how I really don't like that. So I started voicing my opinions again a couple of days ago and as expected, I offended people. So I reflected on how I can solve this problem and I came up with this...if I am NOT your cup of tea, please unfriend or unfollow me. I promise it won't hurt my feelings. I don't want to risk damaging even a superficial friendship with stupid differences of opinion. If you like me enough that you still want to know what I'm up to and you want to see way too many pictures of my beautiful granddaughter, Instagram Stacey is a great option for you. She's pretty much the on-the-surface Stacey who is much easier to like. If I AM your cup of tea, great! You're going to be hearing a lot more from me. Sorry for the long post, but I just had to get that off my chest. Carry on...
As a result of that post, about 20 people unfriended me. I'm not upset about that; they were just heeding my suggestion. But it made me think that perhaps I needed an alternate platform for those friends who actually do enjoy my musings and have responded in a positive way to my posts. So out of all of that, this blog was born. I hope it will be a place where I can start some great conversations, and I hope you enjoy it! But if you don't, feel free to NOT read it. Life really is that simple sometimes. :)
Dear Facebook Friends:
I think it's time for some of us to break up. A very dear friend of mine messaged me something the other day that reminded him of me. It was a post he saw titled "You Are Not Everyone's Cup of Tea." It talked about how some people are Your People and some are just not for you, as you are not for them, and how that is OK. I really took it to heart. I basically have 2 rules for FB - 1, I don't unfriend, unfollow or block people no matter what and 2, I don't turn down friend requests as long as I know the person, worked or went to school with them or belong to a group in common with them. Consequently, I have a wide range of "types" of friends. I have a handful (maybe 2 handfuls, since I am very blessed) of people who know me well, know what's in my heart and love me for who I am with all of my glorious imperfections. These are My People. I have a handful of friends who started out as acquaintances and have become good Facebook friends who enjoy meaningful conversations on a variety of topics and support my right to voice my opinion even though they may not always agree with me. I cherish these friendships as I think these are the people I learn from the most. Then there are the vast majority of my FB friends who know the on-the-surface Stacey. The Stacey who is polite, quiet, reserved and non-confrontational. You know, the Stepford Wife Stacey. I'm biased, but I have to admit that this Stacey is pretty darn likeable. She's the one you know if you've worked with her, you've met her through her volunteer activities or your kids have gone to school together or been on the same team or in the same dance group. Then there are the friends I've never actually met but that have some common interests. These last two groups are the people who have kept me silent about some things that really matter to me. I've been afraid of offending them because I never want to offend and I don't want to be judged solely for the way I feel about any particular topic. I am a complex person with a range of opinions and I like to learn from others whether they agree with me or not. So here's the deal...my friend's message made me think about how I'm censoring myself and how I really don't like that. So I started voicing my opinions again a couple of days ago and as expected, I offended people. So I reflected on how I can solve this problem and I came up with this...if I am NOT your cup of tea, please unfriend or unfollow me. I promise it won't hurt my feelings. I don't want to risk damaging even a superficial friendship with stupid differences of opinion. If you like me enough that you still want to know what I'm up to and you want to see way too many pictures of my beautiful granddaughter, Instagram Stacey is a great option for you. She's pretty much the on-the-surface Stacey who is much easier to like. If I AM your cup of tea, great! You're going to be hearing a lot more from me. Sorry for the long post, but I just had to get that off my chest. Carry on...
As a result of that post, about 20 people unfriended me. I'm not upset about that; they were just heeding my suggestion. But it made me think that perhaps I needed an alternate platform for those friends who actually do enjoy my musings and have responded in a positive way to my posts. So out of all of that, this blog was born. I hope it will be a place where I can start some great conversations, and I hope you enjoy it! But if you don't, feel free to NOT read it. Life really is that simple sometimes. :)